Happy Tuesday everyone!!! I decided to start this blog out with what I wore yesterday. Although the weather called for sun, it took all day for it to finally appear. So I brightened up my dreary day with a red scarf (Old Navy). The jean jacket and t-shirt (Gap). Linen pants(R W and Co). Ballet flats (Aldo).
Onto the first part of the title: 30 year old Teenagers. A few weeks ago, my husband and I were at a friend’s son’s birthday party. The adults were having a discussion about how difficult it is to make new friends as we get older. I asked the ladies if they felt it was harder for them to make friends vs. the men? They all answered yes and I added that its harder for women because women are much “cattier” than men are. The women totally agreed with me. I found this to be especially true for me; it was extremely hard to make new friends when I first moved here to BC. I felt and still do that those people who grew up here had their “cliques” and weren’t interested. If you didn’t fit into their “cliques”, you weren’t welcome.
So where does the title 30 yr old Teenager come from? It comes from my experience a few years back when I had my son. I tried to make new acquaintances with some moms and found it very difficult. Those moms already knew each other and I was the “new” mom. I felt like an outsider and no matter what I did I felt like I never belonged. Eventually I just gave up trying and decided to continue friendships with those moms who actually cared and showed an interest in me, and establishing a friendship.
Why is it that when women feel threatened they revert back to being teenagers? And why do women feel threatened by other women? I swear we are 30-40 year old women behaving like we’re 13 year old teenage girls again. Why must women do that? I was at a 2 year old little girl’s birthday party last year and decided to wear a pair of trouser jeans, a tank top, a cardigan and then belted the cardigan. One of the moms at the party eyed me up and down and gave me the nastiest look. I thought to myself, have I done something to offend you? Does my cardigan offend you? Does the fact that I belted my cardigan offend you? Its so funny because after we left I told my husband what had happened and he commented that he too felt the same way and that it was like keeping up with the Jones’ in there. It honestly felt like an episode of the “Housewives”. Needless to say we never returned. I naively thought that the older we got, the easier it would be to make friends and that the cattiness, and teenage-like behavior would be long gone. But I guess I was sorely mistaken.
It is nice to hear that I am not alone in feeling this way. I have spoken with a few of my women friends and they too say that they have had similar experiences. Since my encounter with those women (to clarify it wasn’t just one incident, it was many, many instances where they made me feel like I didn’t belong), I decided that I am too old to put up with this kind of bullshit!! I don’t need people like that in my life. If how I dress, or speak, or the way I am offends you then I’m very sorry but I this is who I am, like it or leave it!!!! I don’t need to be reminded of what it was like to be a 14 year old girl bullied and made fun of. I’ve been there and I hope never to return, nor do I need to feel like I’m apart of a “Housewives” episode.
For my 33rd birthday I decided to go out to dinner with some friends and I did something different: I invited only those women that I truly cared about and that I knew felt the same way about me. What a difference it made!!! Everyone got along so well and I never once worried about saying the wrong thing, or wearing the wrong outfit, or worried about being myself. I could be my true self with these women and it felt great.
To any women out there who either feels this way or has felt this way, don’t worry about it, you are not alone. Those women are not worth your time or energy. At the end of the day I feel sorry for them, that they need to behave this way to make themselves feel better. They are the ones who are missing out on an amazing person and friendship.
Now onto a lighter topic: shirts that make you feel pretty. I am a huge fan of TLC’s show “What not to wear”. In the past few episodes I have noticed that Stacy and Clinton have asked the women whether their current wardrobe makes them feel pretty? All of the women responded no. It got me thinking that whenever I am planning out my outfits for the week, I think about what makes me feel pretty. Below are 2 shirts that make me feel very pretty. I like them because they are not black, because they drape beautifully around your waist, and because they are versatile. Below are pictures of 2 shirts that I love and 2 different ways to wear them.
The first one is a brown shirt (R W & Co.) shown how to wear it on two separate occasions.
I wore this outfit out with my son for a playdate on Friday.
The top (R W & Co.). Necklace (Stella & Dot). Watch (Michael Kors). Jeans (R W & Co.). Shoes (Steve Madden).
The next picture shows the same brown top dressed up. I would wear this out for a date with my husband.
Necklace (Banana Republic). Watch (Michael Kors). Bracelet (Stella & Dot). Jeans (R W & Co.) Booties (Aldo).
The next top is a purple top from Mexx. I wore this outfit this past Saturday to a girl’s night.
Top (Mexx). Necklace (Banana Republic), Watch (Michael Kors). Bracelet (Stella and Dot). Pants (Gap). Flower sandals (Steve Madden).
The last outfit is also an outfit that I would wear going out with my husband.
May this blog inspire you to surround yourself with people who accept you for who you are and bring out the best in you and to inspire you to find a shirt that makes you feel pretty, because everyone deserves to feel pretty 🙂
Happy Tuesday Everyone!!! 🙂